The house and stuff

As a continuation of the questions that people asked the other night, I figured I'd go with the topic of the house.

Honestly, this whole I Now Own A House thing is still so surreal. I catch myself smiling as I drive down the street toward it, thinking "Hey, that's a pretty cool house over there on the corner. Well, would you look at that? It's mine." Seriously. I have conversations in my head like that on a regular basis.

"I'm going to stroll down my hallway into my bedroom past my walk-in closet and go to my bathroom to use my toilet." Then I sit on the toilet and look around and think "Yeah, I think I'm going to rip this tile out of here and just paint the walls - because you know, it's MINE."

"I think I'm going to rip this hideous bush out of the flowerbed and plant something else, just because I can."

"I'm going to put my garden over there. No, I want my clothesline there. The garden can go over THERE."

It's an odd feeling, this MINE thing.

But at the same time, it brings a whole host of frustrations. I had help with the actual move, as in relocating stuff from the old house to here. But that's pretty much where it ended. The Dude hasn't been able to do a whole bunch because of medical stuff, so the majority of it has been on me. For the most part, I'm ok with that. I'm a bit of a control freak about some a lot of most stuff. What's hard though is when I ask for help, and there's no one there for whatever reason. Tonight, with Alex's help (you know, the 8 year old who just had a skin graft done on Monday?) I was able to move the pool table out of the way so that I could get the floor underneath it painted - I have been trying and trying to get help with that, but .... yeah. It's moved. The floor is primed. I should be able to paint it and get the pool table put back by the end of the weekend, with or without help from a grown-up. I also pulled everything out of Jared's room and primed his floor so that I can get his room done too.

(And before any of my local friends get offended, this isn't aimed at anyone in particular. Got it?)

I still have a ton of work to do yet. I have to finish the basement, which involves a few more steps to getting the floor done, then moving the massive pile of craft stuff out of the living room and sorting it out down there, to actually getting my craft stuff set up so that I can catch up on projects whose due dates passed MONTHS ago - literally. I am desperate to get my basement done just so that I can catch up on everything and get stuff out to the people who are waiting for it.

But honestly, looking around this place makes me realize again how lucky I am. I talked the other night about how I can afford to own a house and even though I know that for at least right now, I don't have to worry about having the money to make the payment every month, I feel a responsibility to make improvements on the house to make it acceptable (in my eyes) for the kids. I have a fear that something big is going to break and I'm not going to have the money to fix it. For example, the central air is acting a little wonky right now - and I'm terrified that it's going to cost me a lot of money when realistically it's probably something stupid. But I'm doing something amazing here - I bought a house. Me. Just me. Alone. It's mine.

And that, to me, is so amazing that I can't even begin to explain. I just can't. There are no words.

At the same time though, while it's mine on paper - realistically The Dude and I bought it together. We looked at every house together and we discussed everything and made every decision as a couple. He doesn't live here - yet - but ultimately, this is going to be the home that we share. He has had a bunch of health issues over the past few months that have put some kinks in some of our plans - but the plans are still there. For now, I am doing the physical stuff - and he is my biggest and loudest cheerleader. We are working toward combining households, but there are so many things that have to happen in order to get there.

Finally for the million dollar question about whether or not we'll ever get married.....I still say never.

(If you want some background on that, you can check out this post and then this post to get the basic understanding.)

Marriage still terrifies me to no end. The Dude and I have now been together for almost 2 1/2 years, and life is good. We don't get to spend nearly enough time together for a myriad of reasons, and I'll be totally honest and admit that I've been picking fights with him - but I'm going to blame it on stress and not seeing enough of each other and stress. I get pissed, I get unreasonable and obnoxious and hateful and yell at him, and he calls me out on it and then we kiss and make up. And then I sit here and wonder "what just happened?" and "why is he still here?" Bottom line is that he IS still here - and that in and of itself is terrifying to me because it's making me think that maybe he really IS planning on sticking around for the long haul.

Even after 2 1/2 years, I'm still getting used to the idea that he's not going to walk away any time soon - but that's still not enough to convince my overly dense head that he might just stay around forever.

One day at a time. It applies to so many things right now.

I couldn't do it...

...if it wasn't for The Dude.

Seriously. As I get ready to start my third week of this full-time working gig, it's really dawned on me just how amazing he has has been - and continues to be.

If he doesn't come over and spend the night before I have to work, he gets up around 4:00am so that he can be here between 4:30 and 5:00am. He makes sure that I get up when my alarm goes off (not a feat for the weak, mind you) and then he sleeps for a couple more hours until the kids get out of bed. While I'm at work, he feeds them breakfast and lunch, makes sure that they don't kill each other, and he takes care of the house. My house. Not his house or our house - but my house. He'll do dishes and do laundry and take out the trash or whatever needs to be done - and if I leave him a list, he does everything on it. He makes me something to eat when I come staggering back in the door at 2:00 - or sometimes as late as 3:30pm.

And with school starting this week, he'll soon be responsible for getting the kids up and dressed and fed and to school in the mornings too - which is not an easy thing to do on a good day.

Yesterday, we got the chance to go to a cookout that some friends of his were having. The weather was finally nice after close to 2 weeks of solid rain and flooding, and we had a great time. The kids got to run around and act like idiots and bounce in the bouncy house and swing on the swings, and he and I got to sit and visit with people and just relax. Afterwards, we did a little bit of shopping since we were in the city and had a few more options of places to go (I still can't find any more pants that I like for work) and then we came home and relaxed. The boys went to spend the night with The Dude's mother for an impromptu sleepover, so we had the house to ourselves for the night.

He knew that I was exhausted - so he didn't give me too hard of a time when I slept through the entire movie that we had planned to watch together. We woke up this morning and he went and picked Alex up and brought him back over here so that he could go spend the day with his father, and I promptly fell asleep again. At some point, I got up and moved to the couch so that we could watch another movie, and -  you guessed it - I slept through it. Finally, The Dude made me get up and go back to bed, and he went back to his place and took Daniel swimming for a couple of hours so that I could sleep some more. He brought Daniel back sometime in the afternoon - and then Daniel promptly fell asleep. I finally got up - for real - around 5:00pm.

I guess I was way more tired than even I thought that I was.

My job is hard. The hours suck, it's physically demanding, and it makes me lose a lot of time with my kids. But I know that it is what I need to do right now in order to get us into our own house, which is the ultimate end goal at this point. I know that it's what I need to do, even if it's not always fun and pleasant. But the bottom line is that none of this would be possible without the love and support from The Dude. Whether he's taking care of everything at the house while I'm at work, or simply letting me sleep - I couldn't do it without him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Just a couple more shots from around the cookout...

There was a really big fish.

Alex being Alex. I tried not to watch him so that I didn't
have a panic attack.

A year of love...and bizarre connections

One year ago today I took a step that I swore that I would never take again.

I finally admitted that I was in love with The Dude - and I told him.

It was kind of funny how it came about. A dear friend of mine needed a ride to the airport in the wee hours of the morning. She came here and spent the night, and we got maybe an hour of sleep before we had to get up and hit the road for the 3 hour drive. The Dude spent the night as well so that he could take Alex to school for me that morning, and he was still (half)asleep when we were getting ready to leave. I was honestly worried about having an accident because I had gotten so little sleep and had 6 hours of driving ahead of me, and I figured that if I was going to die in a fiery crash, then by God he was going to know how I felt about him. (Yes, that is seriously the thought that went through my head at the time.)

Before she and I walked out the door, I walked back over to the bed, sat down on the edge of it, gave him a quick kiss and told him that I loved him. And yes, he said it back to me. :)

Needless to say, I made it back alive - and incredibly happy. We've made it through great times and bad, but somehow we always manage to do it together and we haven't strangled each other - yet. I'm still not sure how he puts up with my crap on a daily basis, but he does and I am forever grateful for that.

Dreaming of hot days out at the lake.....

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Now, here's where the story gets kind of funny. The friend who needed a ride to the airport - well, she has a facebook page and a blog and they can be found here. We have another friend who - surprise - has a page and a blog and they can be found here. The three of us have been friends for almost 9 years now, and we've also had our shares of ups and downs - but we'll always be friends no matter what. Plus we have this really bizarre connection - 1st Time Mama and I share our "non-anniversary" - we each married our first husbands on August 14, 1999 - long before we knew each other. August 14 also happens to be Ordinary Girl's birthday.

Plus, today is 1st Time Mama's birthday AND it's the anniversary of the day that I admitted that I love The Dude.

There are other eerie similarities and connections between the three of us, but I'll leave the rest of it up to your imaginations!

So, go and visit their pages and make sure that you wish 1st Time Mama a very happy birthday too - she's on a road trip at the moment so I'm not sure how often she's checking in, but it would be cool for her to find lots of birthday wishes on her page!

On love and marriage...

I believe in God. I go to church almost weekly (hey, I'm human). I take my kids to church. We discuss religion at home. I attend a Methodist church. The kids also attend a Baptist church with their father and occasionally a Mennonite church with their aunt and uncle. We have friends and family who are Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Jehovah’s Witness, Pagan, agnostics and atheists.

All of those people are good people – regardless of their beliefs. I don’t have to agree with their religious beliefs, but I firmly believe in their right to have those beliefs and to celebrate them as they see fit. And the nice thing is that if I don’t understand something about their belief, rather than making assumptions, I can ask them about it or research it to find the answer and learn more about it. I don’t tell them that they are wrong because they don’t believe the same thing that I do, and I don’t believe that I am a better person than they are simply because of my own belief system.

This morning in my personal facebook newsfeed, there were two articles floating around that caught my eye. One was about the "Equality House" that is across the street from the WBC in Topeka and one was about a church in North Carolina that has stopped performing ANY marriage ceremonies until the right to marry is granted to ALL couples. You can go and read both of those articles for yourself if you would like - but as soon as I did, I immediately shared both of them from my personal profile because this is something that I fully support.

Wait, what’s that? I believe in God AND support equal rights for all people? How can that be?

Look at it this way.

I have friends who are vegans. They won’t eat anything that comes from an animal. Nothing. They eat fruits and veggies and tofu and weird stuff like that. I don’t totally understand it, and I’m not sure why they would want to give up the deliciousness that is bacon cheeseburgers, but they do. And you know what? It doesn’t affect me one single bit. Not one bit. What they choose to do at their dinner table does not affect me at all. 

If they come over for dinner, I can do a few things. I can ignore the fact that they’re vegan and cook up a wonderful meaty meal and make them feel uncomfortable (and hungry), or I can make a killer salad with no animal products in it that I might not like, or I can ask them what to make so that we can all enjoy a wonderful meal. One thing that I won’t do is force them to eat a burger – because even though I think it’s odd that they won’t, I understand that they do some things differently than I do.

Same goes for my gay friends and family. I can be selfish and ignore their ‘gayness’ and make them feel uncomfortable just so that I don’t have to face it, or I can love them and accept them for who they are – good people who happen to do things a little differently than I do. I don’t try to force my beliefs on them because my beliefs are no more right than theirs are.

If the kids ask me why our vegan friends don’t eat the same food that we do, I can simply tell them “because some people eat meat and some don’t, and that’s ok” and move on with it. No big deal, right? 

And *gasp* what if my kids ask why a guy is holding hands with another guy? For the record, they have asked – and my response was “because, kids, sometimes guys fall in love with guys, and sometimes girls fall in love with girls.” And you know what the kids’ reaction was? “Oh. OK. What’s for supper?” They are not scarred for life by seeing two men holding hands or even kissing any more than they are by witnessing heterosexual displays of affection. They understand that everyone is different, and they treat everyone with the love and respect that is deserved. They may not agree with it when they get older and fully understand everything about homosexuality, but at least they’ll be open-minded enough to understand that being gay does not equate to being a bad person.

Yes, I know that there is a big difference between being vegan and being gay. But you know what? It all boils down to the fact that people are different. Different people do and believe different things for different reasons – but it doesn't automatically mean that they are horrible people or deserve to be treated as though they are less than human.

People like to throw around the whole “but the Bible says it’s wrong” argument. But you know what? Not everyone believes in the same Bible. Not everyone has the same religious beliefs. All people have the right to believe in their own philosophies, whether you agree with them or not. My Bible might say that it’s wrong, but my Bible goes with my religion. Someone who follows a different religion has a different book of ‘rules’ and THAT book might say that it’s perfectly fine – but since that person has the right to believe in their religion just as I have the right to believe in mine, who is right?

No one. 

The first amendment says “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances”.

Let me repeat that first part: “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof…” But laws have been passed banning gay marriage (or as I like to call it: "marriage") because it goes against some people's religious beliefs? How does that work? Doesn't banning anything based on religious beliefs go directly against the first amendment?

Your religious beliefs are not right. My religious beliefs are not right. The gay guy down the street? His aren’t right either. NO ONE’S RELIGIOUS BELIEFS ARE RIGHT. No person has the right to impose his/her religious beliefs on anyone. Period. Your religion is your own. Mine is mine. I may not agree with your religion, and you may not agree with mine, but it doesn't mean that either one of us is right or wrong.

Bottom line: You wouldn’t be free to have your religious beliefs without the first amendment protecting your right to do so – and at the same time, that same amendment gives everyone else in this country the freedom to have his/her own religious beliefs. I believe in God – or at least the idea that there is something out there that is way bigger than all of us – but I don’t necessarily believe in following every single thing that is in the Bible – and that is my right, just as others have the right to feel differently.

Human rights. Equal rights. Regardless of religion, everyone deserves to be treated equally and fairly.

People need to stop trying to shove their own beliefs down everyone else’s throats. Stop worrying about what everyone else is doing, and live your own life the way that you choose. Be the best person that you can possibly be. If you live your life in the best way possible for you, then you have nothing to worry about in whatever version of the hereafter you choose to believe exists. And hey, the entire world might actually end up being a better place to be.

My rock

I don't know how he does it. I really don't.

The Dude has the patience of a saint. Really.

We have been going through a lot of stuff around here lately. Some really deep dark stuff. It's not fun, it's not pretty, and honestly it's not something that I would wish on my worst enemy. But, we have to deal with it.

No, let me rephrase that.

I have to deal with it.

It's my stuff to handle. My problems. My issues. My responsibilities. It's not something that he has to deal with at all.

But yet, he does. He is right there, in the midst of it, helping and supporting and loving. He's making supper for the kids and helping with homework and keeping an eye on them while I go take care of the dirty work. He's giving me pep talks through online messages when he can't be here.

Most importantly, he is loving us. Not just me, but all of us.

And he's doing it all by choice.

It's not just the crappy stuff. He puts up with everything. He even puts up with this whole blogging thing and cheers me on with it just as much as he supports me through the crap.

There is absolutely no way that I can ever thank him enough for everything that he does for us. No way humanly possible.

About 15 seconds after I took this, he admitted that the
wasabi was a bit hotter than he expected.
I might have laughed at him.

I love you, babes. Thank you for everything.

You asked for it....

So every now and then I like to have the people on my facebook page to ask me questions, and I answer them. I did that tonight and although they were being a bit goofy, I decided to go ahead and answer all of them anyway.

So there.

Bruce asked: Why is The Weather Channel reporting from VA about a minor snow storm? And...how will we survive the blizzard? 

To the first part, I can say it's because y'all are a bunch of flatlanders, much like the people in Kansas. That, or it's just a slow news night. I'm pretty sure that YOU will survive your impending blizzard with your guitar, maybe some alcohol, and your beautiful wife by your side!

Alice asked: Will you still love me tomorrow? 

Always, my dear. Always.

Melissa asked:  Why does Nicki Minaj look like a Muppet from outer space?...

Ummmmm......who? Honestly, I've heard her name, but I really have no clue who she is. Am I showing my age, or my total lack of disregard for current pop culture? Or both?

Brown, black.
Plastic, wood, paper.
Crooked, straight.
My wall, my rules. :)

Rebecca asked: Why can't brown and black frames (on a wall) coexist? Is there some sort of frame law against such tyranny?

Oh, now that's a simple one for me. They can coexist. Very nicely too. But then again, I've never been the type of person to stick to decorating (or fashion) rules. I say if you think it looks good, and you like it, then go for it. Create your own style. Do something different. Think outside of the proverbial box!!! And then show me pictures, because I want to see. Seriously.

Jenni asked: I'm loving the questions! Lol. I have 1! Are we there yet?!

You would. Brat. And the answer is no, because we haven't gotten together for our day-long Bizarre Places of Kansas Photography playdate yet. We need to do that.

Then Jennifer decided to hit me with questions......so here are all of hers:

Jennifer asked: Well, you have been smoke free for six months now. Congrats! Do you still crave them? Also, I thought you re giving up caffeine. What happened toto that.

Toto went back to Oz. ;)

Seriously though, yes, I still crave cigarettes every. single. day. Especially when I'm around people who still smoke *hint hint*. It's hard. Extremely hard. But I do feel better without them and I really want to never pick one up again. Never ever.

As for the caffeine....yeah, well, I did really well until we went on vacation, and then I had to have some to drive. And some led to more, which led to more, which led back into the full-fledged addiction again. It's next on the list of things to go. Again.

How early is too early to send your kids to bed for misbehaving?

Honestly, as far as I'm concerned, it's never too early. They get warned, sometimes too many times. And when they've reached that point, they go to bed. It's been as early as 6:00pm around here a few times - and usually that child is asleep within a few minutes. I try not to use the going-to-bed thing as punishment unless I have to do it and I know that they are truly tired. I don't want bedtime to be turned into a battle because they always look at it as punishment, so it's used very sparingly.

Would you ever consider getting your kids cell phones for emergencies?

Well.....the girls had one that they shared. Ex1 and his wife were able to get one added to their plan for nothing (or next to nothing) so they did carry it on the few times that they were alone, or to practices or other events when they would need to call for a ride home. They proved that they were responsible with that, so we actually went together and got Sarah one for her 13th birthday. Ex1 and I both pay for it, so she has to follow our rules with it at each house. She's gotten it taken away from her more than once here for having her nose glued to it, but for the most part she's been ok with it. She does have certain expectations with it, and so far it's been ok. I'm not crazy about the idea, but in this day and age I do feel a bit more comfortable knowing that she has it. Emily still uses the other one when she is at activities, but she does not carry it with her at all times.

What is the first thing you would do if you won a massive lottery?

There isn't ONE thing, but a few things that are all kind of lumped together. First off, pay off all of my bills and The Dude's bills. Get us in the clear as far as debt goes. Buy us both dependable vehicles so that we wouldn't have to worry about that anymore. Build our dream house in the town that we are trying to move to so that all of the kids could be in the same school district. At that point, we are set - we are debt-free, we have transportation, and the kids are all in the same school. Those are the major hurdles that we are facing right now and once we clear those, we can figure out the rest of it as we go.

If you weren't with Dude, what celeb would you date if the oppotunity arose?

Do I have to pick just one?

Sheesh.....there is always my first love - Jon Bon Jovi. First celebrity crush, and yeah, still crazy about the man. Have you seen the picture of him in the Versace ad? Oh, hello........

There's also Denzel Washington. I don't know what it is about that man..... The Dude actually humors me and occasionally brings over a movie with Denzel in it for us to watch. He's so good to me.

Dierks Bentley. Love his curly hair. And his voice.

I think those are my top 3. For today.

Would you ever consider getting lasik (spelling?) surgery?

In. a. heartbeat.

I've been asked a lot recently if I would consider getting ads or sponsors on my blog in order to make money and I keep telling people that I'm really not interested. I'm not looking to make money or get freebies from doing my blog. However, if a sponsor were to come to me and say "hey, we'll do lasik on your eyes for free if you'll let us advertise on your blog" I'd be all over that. No questions asked. My vision has gotten so much worse over the years, I hate wearing glasses with a passion, I don't want to deal with the hassle of contacts (been there done that) and I just want to be able to see. Not to mention that I want to wear really cute sunglasses. Not dorky clip-ons.

Have you ever thought about making a daily chore list for the kids?

All. the. time. But have I done it yet? Nope. Why? Too many distractions. Life keeps getting in the way. However, it's something that I've been thinking about more and more and it's something that I want to do, but I'm going to have to do it slowly because otherwise they're just going to rebel against it. I need to figure out a time that I can sit down with all of them - possibly individually - and talk to them about it and my expectations of them. Things have gotten out of hand around the house, and they need to do more to help me. I know that.

What some people don't realize though is that as a single parent, it's hard. I can't be in two places in the house at one time. I can't be making sure that the boys are doing one thing and making sure that the girls are doing their thing at the same time. I can be watching over the boys while they do their thing, and the girls are getting into a fistfight behind my back, or vice versa. It's hard and it's stressful. Lists need to be made, but at the same time the kids need to have some input into them or it's never going to work.

The Story of Us

It has been a year - exactly one year ago today was the day that The Dude and I went on our first date.

But there is so much backstory leading up to that night that I thought that I would finally share all of it now. We've hinted around about it before, but I have never really spilled all of the details.

My second husband and I split up in May 2009. I knew at that time that it was over and that there was no turning back as far as that relationship went. I was done with it, and as far as I was concerned, I was done with relationships entirely.

But, as time went on and after my divorce was final in January 2011, I thought that maybe I was ready to put myself out there again. So I half-heartedly set up an account on one of those *cough* wonderful free online dating sites. I messaged back and forth with a few guys, and even went out on a few dates, but none of it felt right. And after my ex unexpectedly passed away, I suddenly realized that I was NOT ready to be dating. I had way too many emotions to work through at that point. So I quickly hid my profile on the dating site, and promptly forgot about it.

Months passed, and my mental state improved. I don't know if anyone really knows just how deeply his death affected me - but it did. There were a lot of unresolved issues, and there were many things that I had to learn to accept before I could think about moving forward with my life. Finally, I felt like I was there.

So in about mid-September or so, I unhid my profile on that site. I tweaked it a bit, and added a few more pictures along with more disclaimers - for instance "I am NOT a booty call", "I will NOT send you naked pictures", "I have 5 kids with 3 different fathers, so if that bothers you then you need to move along because it can't be changed" and other things like that. Buried in the midst of my profile was a little blurb that said something to the effect of "I don't go to the gym, but I do try to walk/jog several times per week and I'm currently training for my second half-marathon - there's a story behind that, so if you'd like to know it, just ask".

Anyway, more messaging back and forth with various guys, more dates that never went anywhere, more idiots who only wanted a booty call or naked pictures, and more morons who wanted to just jump straight into a relationship.

 Somewhere around mid-November, I decided that I was done with even attempting to meet someone. Either that site was useless, or I was an idiot-magnet, or something. But I was done with it. I decided that instead of just hiding my profile, I was going to delete it for good. I was looking around for the 'delete' button and I couldn't find it anywhere. Then I got distracted and had to walk away from the computer again.

When I came back to the computer a couple of hours later, I was downright disgusted to see that I had another message in my inbox on that site. I seriously almost deleted it without even looking but I thought no, that would be rude, and I might as well read it. So I sat down and looked. I looked at the guy's profile first and thought "hmmmm.... he's cute" and so I opened the message fully expecting to see another "hey baby" or "wanna chat" looking at me.

Instead, his message read something like "They say curiosity killed the cat. I'm not feline, but I'd love to know the story behind the half-marathon".

I sat back in my chair, surprised. Here was a guy who obviously actually read my profile and paid attention to it - and he knew how to capitalize the appropriate words and didn't type in text-speak. I figured that it wouldn't hurt to message him back before I deleted my profile.

I think we messaged back and forth until about 4am that night.  And the next night. And for several more after that. We talked about so many things in those messages - and it was so easy.

Neither one of us can remember for sure how long we messaged back and forth like that, but it was somewhere in the 1-2 week range - and then we decided to meet. Thanksgiving was coming, and so he asked me what my schedule with the kids was like for the next few days. I told him (figuring that if anything was going to scare him, the multiple holiday custody arrangements that go along with having multiple kids with multiple fathers would) but instead he suggested that we just meet at Burger King the day after Thanksgiving so that I could bring Daniel with me and he could play in the playground while we talked, and I would not have to pay for a sitter. Surprised by his willingness to work around my schedule, I agreed.

So, on November 25, 2011 we met face to face for the very first time. We sat and chatted and watched Daniel play for probably 2 hours or more. Then he came over to my house the next day to watch a movie, and we ended up talking (yes, talking) until 4am.

It took a few weeks for me to get up the nerve to agree that this was what I wanted. I went into it saying "no relationship" and just kind of found myself in one. But I vowed that it wasn't going to get serious. Seeing each other exclusively was fine - but no, it wasn't going to be serious.

Five months into it, we admitted that we loved each other. And here we are a year later.

Yeah, we kind of like each other.
And this might be one of my favorite pictures of us.

Had to gross out the kids with this one!

It hasn't been the easiest year. We've definitely had our ups and downs, but we've been able to work through all of it together and we've come out stronger than ever each time. We still talk about everything. We don't make major decisions without discussing them first. We have been brutally honest with each other, and have hurt each other's feelings plenty of times, but at the same time the honesty is what keeps us strong as a couple. It's something that I've never had the chance to experience before, and I have to admit that it is amazing. We've made it through major holidays with extended family, a cross-country road trip with the kids, massive catastrophic mechanical failure in my van, health issues for both of us.....all of that on top of the typical stress that I deal with on a normal basis with the kids and school and custody.... and we still like love each other.

He's still the first thing I think of when I wake up in the morning and the last thing I think of when I fall asleep at night. I still get butterflies in my stomach when I see him walk into the room and he can still make me melt with just a look from him.

I don't know what I did to deserve a man like him, but I'm not going to argue.

Happy anniversary, babe. I love you!

Busy day...

...but what else is new?

I dropped the boys off at school and then got a text from Ex1 asking me if I was coming to Sarah's honor roll assembly this morning. Which was happening in 20 minutes. 15 miles away.

So as I attempted to hightail it out of town to get there even remotely close to on time, I got stuck in the traffic (traffic? this town never has traffic!) from not one, but TWO accidents that happened within a block of each other. I took off and whipped (carefully) through some residential neighborhoods to get around the idiots traffic and got on my way again, only to get caught behind a bike that was pulling a buggy. Seriously. It was a bike. A regular old 10-speed type bike. With a buggy. And a guy who looked like he was really really tired who was pedaling along on his merry little way in front of me.

Needless to say, that didn't last long. I got around him as quickly as I could and took off again.

I made it to the school just as they called Sarah's name and she walked across the stage. Granted, I might have been wearing the clothes that I slept in last night (plus a sweatshirt over top) and I might have looked like absolute crap, but at least I did brush my teeth before I left the house and I did put some deodorant on (I think). And at least I was wearing sweats, and not pajama pants. And I was there.

So anyway, I left the school and headed back towards town, intent on getting stuff done that I really needed to do....

....oh look! My favorite bull was close to the road this time! Yes, I had to stop and take his picture again - but he wouldn't moooove out from behind the gate. *snicker*

(Speaking of this gorgeous guy, did you see the cover photo on my facebook page?)

I got back to town, and I did my civic duty.

And that's all I'm going to say about that.

Notice the shirt? What a goober.

And then The Dude came over and took me out to lunch (wait, wasn't I supposed to be getting stuff done around the house today?) and .....

.... there are so many stories that I could tell about that lunch. But, I'm going to save some of them. There are stories about snorting whiz, peepee hands, having a keeper, and Vegas - but not necessarily in that order. One of the things that I love about him is that we laugh together. Constantly. We laugh with each other and at each other on a regular basis - and it's awesome.

After lunch, we got the oil changed in my van, which resulted in more fun - but truth be told I am just so thankful that he is willing and able to do this kind of stuff for me. And it's not even like he does it for me - we do this stuff together. And it's fun.


Did I mention that he always makes me laugh?

The last thing of the day was going to Sarah's first Scholar's Bowl. The Dude kept Alex and Daniel here at the house so that I could go by myself since I wasn't really sure what to expect - and it's a good thing too because they never would have stayed quiet for that long.

The kids on her team did well, but not as good as they needed to in order to win. But, this was their first time out and it was obvious that they were nervous, especially at the beginning. As the evening progressed, I could see their confidence building. I can't wait to see how well they do as the season (do they call it a season?) continues.

After I got home, The Dude took off to his place, I got the boys in bed, did a little bit of cleaning, and then set the mousetraps in the kitchen. I can hear something out there messing around, but I refuse to move from my spot until I hear a trap snap - which will hopefully be soon. The Dude actually witnessed the mouse stroll out of the laundry room and cruise around the kitchen for a few minutes before strolling back into the laundry room - so not only is he in my house uninvited, but he's brazen too. That will end, and it will not end in a good way for the mouse.