3:12:32

I did it. I really, really did it.

I finished a half-marathon. My very first one.

It was incredible. The weather was cool, overcast, and a bit windy. There were somewhere around 1200-1300 runners. I started in the very back of the pack, because, well, I'm not stupid. I didn't want to get trampled first thing. Let the speed demons get ahead first.

I started off walking, and caught up with a group of 4 walkers - two husband/wife combos. I started chatting with one of the wives and found out that they were walking in memory of her neice, who passed away one year ago tomorrow. They had on matching shirts with "In Memory of Emily" on the back. It was beautiful.

Then I went a bit faster, and stayed by myself for several miles. I saw areas of Wichita that I didn't know existed. I want to go back with my camera and get some pictures at some point.

Then around Mile 9 I started walking/jogging with another girl who was about my age. We chatted and paced each other for quite a while. As we chatted, things started to fall into place - turns out that we knew each other! Way back when, when I was doing case managment, she was one of the providers that I spoke to on the phone all the time. We had just never met face-to-face before. Talk about a small world!

She encouraged me to go faster because she was starting to lose some steam, so around Mile 12 I started really pushing myself. I felt so good because at that point I knew that it would have to take something catastrophic to keep me from finishing.

I wasn't prepared for the wave of emotions that hit me as soon as I crossed the finish line.

I'll admit that I cried. Yep, like a big ol' baby.... but only for a few seconds before I pulled myself together. And in among the feelings of happiness and being proud of myself, I will also admit that there was a little bit of a "Take THAT!!!" directed at all of the doubters - all of the people in my life who have ever called me fat, or lazy, or who have flat-out said that I couldn't do it. Guess what? I did it. But I didn't do it for them - I did it for me.

And it feels really freakin' good.

A blog? Really??

So....Where to start? I was messing around on facebook (admittedly one of my worst habits) and being a goofball as usual, I posted a picture of my old ugly boots that I had busted out due to the lovely Kansas weather. I captioned the picture something like "Oh, old ugly boots, how I have missed you". One of my friends piped up and told me that I should start a blog....some discussion ensued, another friend helped set it up, and here I am.

I am just an ordinary person. I'm a single mom who is about to turn 40 and finalize her divorce in just days. I have 5 mostly wonderful kids who keep me busier than most. I stay at home, errrrr, I don't have employment outside of the home but I'm rarely home. I used to have an in-home daycare, but because we had to move I had to close it and reapply and basically start over. That process has started, but it takes time to get everything going again.

My kids range in age from 3 1/2 to 11. The youngest three are boys and the older two are girls. My oldest three came from my first marriage. Then I went through what I like to call my Post-Divorce Rebellious Phase, and surprise! I got #4. I remarried and had the fifth one. So yes, I have 5 kids with 3 different fathers - which adds to the confusion that is my life.

My life hasn't been easy - I've made some craptastic choices and I've been paying the prices in multitudes of ways. But, I try to approach life with a semi-decent attitude, and if I can't do that, a good dose of sarcasm usually helps. I am fiercely independent and hate hate HATE to ask anyone for help with anything, so I usually end up with interesting stories of my escapades - which people seem to think will make some interesting reading for the masses. So, I'll give it a shot and see what happens.

DISCLAIMER: I am doing this via phone - please forgive me now for typos and auto-correct fails.