I'm pretty sure that it's a combination of a lot of those things, plus a whole lot more.
It's funny though. I caught myself the other day - I was standing at the stove making cookies at the time. The boys had come home from school and absolutely begged me to let them go to the park. I had so much stuff to do and as much as I hated to admit it - I didn't feel like going with them. I relented and allowed the three of them to go to the park without me - after giving them a specific list of rules and an even more specific list of what their punishments would be if I even remotely thought that they had gotten out of line - and sent them the 4 blocks to the park.
I think that's when it hit me.
I had clothes hanging out in the summer sun on my new clothesline. I had cookies in the oven. Supper was ready to go into the oven as soon as the cookies came out of it. Laundry was in the washer. I had been puttering around the house, both inside and out, getting projects done all day long. The boys were at the park. The girls were at volleyball practice.
My life is ridiculous right now. Ridiculously wonderful. Ridiculously right.
I spent the last year or two in my old-old house trying to figure out how to get out of it because I knew that it was going to go into foreclosure. Then we moved into the ghetto-esque house and although we knew it was only temporary, we were there for 3 1/2 years.
Now, we're in OUR house. The one that we will stay in for a very long time. For the first time in many years, I feel like I am where I belong, and it feels so ridiculously perfect that I can't even begin to describe it.
I've slept more in the last couple of days than I've slept in the last couple of months, and I think at least part of that is because it's finally starting to hit me that I don't have to keep pushing myself to get stuff done. It's just stuff - and realistically, most of it is cosmetic stuff. I've gotten way more done than I give myself credit for doing, and I didn't realize it until I sat down and started looking through pictures from when we first looked at the house and compared them to what it looks like now. Only then did I realize how much I've done already.
I am so ridiculously grateful right now.
Life is so good - when we take the time to notice.
First off, I think that you are awesome in getting done what you have! We lost a house about 6 years ago, due to illness, bad choices, economy etc. We moved into a rental where we have been and I don't see us buying another house. I am 61, Judy is 66 and we are raising my grandson, 19, who we adopted. 3 dogs, 4 cats, 4 birds and 5 grandkids.
ReplyDeleteAbout the whole list thing and getting stuff done. I know you have and make lists also.I have now been out of work since December '13 having been fired from a job after 17 yrs. Beginning of this year, I took a notebook, labeled it "to do 2014", and made a list of stuff on page one. As I did them, as we did them ( my wife is thrilled to have me home, and I found out I like it and found out I have a son who will even talk to me sometimes!), I would cross them off. When the page got filled and scratched out, and got messy, with doodles and margin notes etc, started a new page. Now 7 months into the year with the prospect of needing to find a part time job looming, I can look back when I am feeling anxious or upset, that I still have so much left to do, I can see exactly what we have accomplished around the house. Even tho it is a rental, Judy treats it as ours and it is a home. So, much like your pics, I can see what we have done and it makes me realize that I haven't sat around and goofed off. And that I need to go back to work, just for the rest it will give me!! Good job, NSM!!